How to Create An Intentional Quiet Time

Summary:

Learn how to craft and create a consistent and intentional quiet time!

And get the FREE RENEW Study to help you realign your heart with the heart of God.

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Podcast Transcript:

Hey friend! Still struggling to choose a word of the year? You still have time to choose a word for 2024 and I have the perfect tool to help you get started and it is absolutely free. Just head to my website brigettehenry.com or click the link in the show notes to get your free copy of my Word of the Year workbook. And then send me a message and let me know what your word of the year is. I would love to hear from you!

Introduction

Welcome to Journey Together, a podcast for Christian women who want a deeper relationship with God. I’m your host, Brigette, and today we’re going to talk about how to create an intentional quiet time.

Hi ladies! It has been a rough couple of weeks over here. Just sickness, and there was a death in the family, and trying to sell our house, there’s been a lot of drama with that. There’s just a lot going on over here so, I covet your prayers, but I also wanted to encourage you. Before I say down to record this podcast I spent some time in my Bible, and I’ve been reading through Hebrews, and I was reading through Hebrews 12:1-2. In the middle of verse 1 it starts like this, “Let us run with endurance the race that lies before us, keeping our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of our faith. For the joy that lay before him, he endured the cross, despising the shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.”

I just want to remind you that in this world we are going to experience suffering and shame. But at the end of this race, at the finish line, there is joy, there is a hope before us that we can hang on to when we’re struggling. That was just a really encouraging passage for me to read considering what’s been happening in the past couple of weeks.

Creating an Intentional Quiet Time

So let’s jump into today’s topic: creating an intentional quiet time. A little confession as we get into today’s topic, I do not have a very consistent quiet time. My Word of the Year for 2023 was Intentional so I thought maybe I would spend some time learning to craft an intentional quiet time, but God took 2023 in a completely different direction. So, as 2024 begins, I want to take some time to help myself create a consistent and intentional quiet time.

And that’s why I want to talk about having an intentional quiet time today because I’ve talked to so many women who want to have a good quiet time routine, but they aren’t sure how to make that happen. Or, like me, they know how to make it happen, it’s just hard.

So, I’ve pulled together some tips and tricks for crafting your quiet time and we’re also going to dive into some of the reasons why you might not have a consistent quiet time and we’ll address those too. So, grab a pen and paper if you’re able so you can take some notes and let’s get started! Also, stick around until the end because I have another freebie for you.

Defining “Quiet Time”

I want to start by defining the phrase “quiet time”. I think that when most of us think of “quiet time” it brings up a lot of shame, guilt and discouragement because we feel like we’re failing. Because we want a better quiet time but we don’t know how to get there.

I also think we have a lot of rules attached to the concept of quiet time like, I have to get up before everyone else in order to have a good quiet time, or I have to read so many pages of my Bible, or I have to spend at least 20 minutes having my quiet time.

And all of these rules aren’t bad, but I think sometimes Satan traps us in the legalism of it. Then quiet time just turns into a checklist of do’s and don’t’s and if we don’t accomplish what we think we need to, we get depressed and frustrated and we don’t get anything out of our quiet time.

So this is the definition of quiet time that I want you to work with, are you ready?

The purpose of quiet time is to realign your heart with the heart of God.

That’s it. Let me say it again. The purpose of quiet time is to realign your heart with the heart of God.

We Are Ambassadors

When I was younger, I heard this great sermon illustration on 2 Corinthians 5:20, which says, “Therefore, we are ambassadors for Christ, since God is making his appeal through us. We plead on Christ’s behalf, “Be reconciled to God.”” Paul is telling the church at Corinth that they are like ambassadors, tasked with sharing the message of Christ’s death and resurrection to the world so that others can be saved.

The thing about ambassadors is that they don’t live in their own country. They serve their country by living in another country. But the longer they live in that other country, the more they’re influenced by it. They start to adopt that country’s values, policies, and culture. So after a few years, they return to their home country to remind themselves of their heritage, who they are and who they serve.

And that’s why we have a quiet time. We do not belong to this world. But, for now, we live in this world, and while we live in this world, we are influenced by it. We have a quiet time to remove ourselves from the world and remind ourselves of our heritage: who we are and Who we serve. We have a quiet time so we can realign our hearts with the heart of God.

This doesn’t mean we’ll always walk away from our quiet time feeling good. We might be confused about something we’re learning, frustrated about God’s will for our lives, or depressed that sin and suffering are still surrounding us. That’s okay. It’s okay to walk away from your quiet time feeling unsure or uncomfortable. The purpose of our quiet time is not to make us feel better, it’s to realign our hearts with the heart of God. I’m going to be saying that a lot.

Quiet Time vs. Living Life with God

Now,I want to clarify the difference between a quiet time and living life with God because this is one of the biggest things that trips us up when we talk about spending time with God.

I think there’s two big misconceptions here. Either we think, “I’m a Christian, so I spend all day with God. I don’t need a quiet time,” or we think “Quiet time is the time I spend with God. The rest of my time is for me.”

So let’s address the first misconception: “I don’t need a quiet time, because I spend all day with God.”

The First Misconception

You can spend all day with God. You can listen to Christian music while you clean your house, you can pray for your coworkers on your way to work, and you can read family devotions together after dinner. Those are all great things! But, they’re not quiet time.

A quiet time is intimate time spent with your Creator. Let’s compare it to a romantic relationship.

I can spend all Saturday with my husband. We can go for walks, chase our kid around, or spend time with family and friends. All those things affirm and strengthen our relationship. But nothing strengthens our relationship like a date night. Nothing connects us like going somewhere together, by ourselves, without distractions and enjoying time together.

Sometimes, I listen to worship music while I wash the dishes. And I’ll sing and worship while I listen. But once in a while, I’ll hear God say, “I need you to step away from this and be alone with me right now.”

And I do. I put down the dishes. I go somewhere quiet. I grab my Bible, my journal or anything else I feel He’s asking me to bring. I’ll even bring the worship music with me so that component doesn’t change. The point is, I step away. It becomes a quiet time because I step away from all the distractions, all the noise that keeps me from connecting with my Creator.

We should spend every minute of our day with God. But we still need to take intentional time with Him to open our hearts and let Him instruct us and guide us.

The Second Misconception

So let’s talk about the second misconception: “Quiet time is my time for God, and the rest of my time is for me.”

This is a really dangerous, but unfortunately very common, belief in the church. Many people who think they are Christians believe that faith is just a religion set aside for church meetings and events, or hard times. It’s a piece of them, but it’s not all of them.

In his book, The Spirit of the Disciplines, Dallis Willard explains that this misconception comes from the idea that our physical bodies are evil, and incapable of doing good. He says, “we tend to think of the body and its functions as only a hindrance to our spiritual calling, with no positive role in our redemption or in our participation in the government of God.”

I could write an entire book on this topic, but for now we’re just going to address the basics.

Our Bodies As Instruments to Carry Out God’s Will

Our bodies are not evil. Many Christians believe the body is evil because both Jesus and Paul referred to “the flesh” as not wanting or desiring good things. But the word “flesh” is actually a reference to our sinful nature. You can find some of those discussions in Matthew 26, Romans 8 and Galatians 5 if you want to dig deeper.

But our physical bodies are not evil. They are given to us by God so that we can do His work on this earth. Christ had a body so that He could do work on earth. God intends for us to live life fully here on earth and our lives should be a testimony of Christ living in us.

When we become Christians, Christ becomes a part of us, and not a part that we can try to dismiss so that we can go our own way. Christ permeates all of our lives, not just church time and devotional time.

And can I just say, I struggle with this too. Especially as a young believer, sometimes I did not want God involved in certain parts of my life. I tried to box Him up and put Him on the shelf when I wanted to do my own thing. It’s normal to struggle with fear and doubt. And it’s all part of our spiritual formation. As we learn to seek Him in all things, living life with Him and having intentional time with Him becomes a more natural response.

Key Components of a Good Quiet Time

Now let’s talk about some key components of a good quiet time. I want to share a few things I recommend become part of your quiet time but before I do: these are not rules. You do not have to have all of these components. Your time with God is yours, and while I highly recommend these things, they are not required. And some of them might not be possible in this season of your life. So walk gracefully into this part of our discussion.

An Element of Scripture

First, I recommend an element of scripture. I say element because I think we bind this part of our quiet time with rules too. We think we have to sit down in a specific chair with a physical Bible and a “Bible in a Year Reading Plan” in order to do quiet time right.

But we are so blessed to have scripture in so many different formats. You can listen to scripture. You can read it on your phone while switching between translations. You can read a devotional book that explains the historical and spiritual context of the scripture you’re reading. There’s so many different ways you can bring scripture into your quiet time!

One word of caution: beware devotional books that are based in 1st and 2nd opinions. That’s my funny way of saying it’s not really biblical, it’s just someone’s opinion. You want to make sure you are really engaging the Word of God during your quiet time, not someone’s opinion.

Prayer

Second, pray. There should be some element of prayer in your quiet time. You can journal your prayers, talk to God out loud or just pray silently.

1 John 5:14 says, “Now this is the confidence we have before Him: whenever we ask anything according to His will, He hears us.” God wants to hear from us. He wants us to talk to Him. And, if we quiet ourselves enough we may hear Him respond.

Silence and Solitude

Which is why my third recommendation is silence and solitude. Dallis Willard considers silence and solitude to be spiritual disciplines that go “hand in hand”. He says, “just as silence is vital to make solitude real, so is solitude needed to make the discipline of silence complete. Very few of us can be silent in the presence of others.”

This is a difficult one because as Willard points out, “most of us live with people.” I’m a stay at home mom to a one-year-old, so I can assure you, silence and solitude are not easy to come by. I actually record my podcasts huddled in the corner of my bedroom surrounded by pillows to dampen the sound while my one-year-old takes a nap.

Sometimes, we have to get a bit creative to have silence and solitude. So here’s what I recommend: aim for distraction-less. Not distractionless, like, free of all distractions, but distraction-less, fewer distractions.

Shut off your phone. Distract your kids with an activity. Listen to music if it helps, and don’t if it hurts. If you struggle with focus, try body doubling. Have your quiet time while a friend or partner does their quiet time, or use a body doubling video. Do what you need to do to have less distractions during your quiet time.

Tips for Crafting Your Intentional Quiet Time

Now I want to wrap this episode up with four tips for having a consistent and intentional quiet time.

Tip #1: Do What Works for You.

If you need to do the same thing everyday, do it. If you need to be spontaneous, prepare for spontaneity. I like a little spontaneity and if I don’t have a certain amount of it in my life I get cranky. Which is why I hate the advice that you should have one place where you always have your quiet time. That doesn’t work for me. I like going to new coffee shops or parks on an open day. I do my quiet time on the couch, the bed, or the floor depending on my mood. I love looking at those beautifully journaled Bibles on Pinterest, but that’s just not going to happen right now. I would like to get up early and have my quiet time before my daughter wakes up, but I am NOT a morning person.

You are not setting yourself up for success if you try to do quiet time like everyone else. You need to do your quiet time however it works best for you. Remember, the purpose of quiet time is to realign your heart with the heart of God. There are so many different ways we can do that, so don’t worry about what works for someone else. Focus on what works for you and how God is calling you to spend your time with Him.

Tip #2: Have a Plan.

This can be a loose plan. I usually have a few things planned for my quiet time: currently I’m reading and studying Hebrews, I have my prayer journal full of prayer requests I pray or journal through, and I have a few books on Spiritual Formation and Disciplines I’m slowly making my way through. Sometimes, I have Bible verses I’ve heard recently that I want to look up and write on notecards so I can put them on my bathroom wall.

I don’t do it all everyday because that would take so much time and it’s not what God is asking of me. If having a concrete plan works for your quiet time, do that. If you need to be spontaneous, keep your options open. Just make sure your plan is realistic for the time and space you have to work with.

Tip#3: Schedule your Quiet Time.

If you use a daily planner, add your quiet time. Let family know you’re spending this time with God, so you won’t be available for a little while. Make sure you give yourself enough time to rest and engage with God.

Now. Some of us have tried to have quiet time every morning and it ALWAYS gets interrupted or cut short. So I’m going to let you in on my secret: I don’t schedule my quiet time once a day, I schedule it three times. So if I miss the morning, it’s okay because I still have two more opportunities to have my quiet time. And, if I manage to get the morning quiet time in, sometimes I do the afternoon and evening anyway. Because there’s no rule that says I can only have quiet time once a day.

Tip #4: Prepare Ahead of Time.

Get all your stuff together so you’re ready to go. If you’re going to distract young children, have the distraction ready to go. If you want to use a certain app, make sure it’s downloaded. If you wait until your scheduled quiet time to get everything together, you’ll feel rushed and you’re not going to be able to spend much time with God. So prepare the night before, in the morning when you first wake up, whatever you need to do to be ready. I highly recommend a basket or cart for all of your quiet time things. It will save you a lot of time in the long run.

Conclusion

Those are my tips for having an intentional quiet time. If you have other tips that have helped you have a great quiet time PLEASE share them! There is a Q and A on the page for this episode where you can share your tips. You can also let me know if there’s anything you would like to hear me talk about on the podcast. And, as always, you can email me at brigette@brigettehenry.com to let me know how you’re doing, what you’d like to hear from the podcast or what you think I could do better. I’d love to hear from you!

Before you go, I have another freebie for you. Years ago I wrote the RENEW study. It’s a 5-day study that helps you examine your heart and realign with God’s heart. I have actually done the study three different times since I wrote it. Everytime I do it, it breaks me a bit and turns me back in God’s direction.

So if you’re struggling, if you feel far from God and you’re not sure how to get closer to Him, I highly recommend the RENEW study. It’s free, and you can get it from my website brigettehenry.com or by using the link in the show notes.

That’s all I have for today. I hope this episode helps you build an intentional quiet time and I will see you next Tuesday. Bye!

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Links:

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Subscribe to my weekly email:⁠ ⁠https://brigettehenry.com/subscribe⁠⁠

FREE Word of the Year workbook: ⁠https://mailchi.mp/0506e8988741/word-of-the-year-sub-page⁠

FREE RENEW Study: ⁠https://mailchi.mp/6b4edc98bcfe/renew-study-sub-page⁠

Contact me at: ⁠⁠brigette@brigettehenry.com⁠

The Spirit of the Disciplines by Dallis Willard: ⁠https://rb.gy/ucpq62⁠

All scripture is CSB (Christian Standard Bible)